When did you last stop to think what makes you truly happy? Though we can’t be happy all the time, moments of happiness are fuel that keeps us thriving.

Often our lives can get so busy that we forget to stop and be grateful for the little moments that make our lives amazing, the beautiful occasions when we can be thankful that we get to live and love. But sometimes we women put everyone else’s happiness above our own and forget that we are equally entitled to moments of joy and laughter.

Darkness and light come in equal measures.

It is of course not realistic to think we can be happy every moment of every day. However, when we acknowledge what makes us happy and increase our awareness of the things we can do to feel free and full of life, we can gradually boost these moments of happiness in our everyday lives.

When asked “what makes you happy” you may want to mention things like “seeing my children do things they love” or “when someone compliments my work” or “getting a promotion”. Notice that the above -mentioned things depend on someone else. We can’t make other people do things, we can only influence the outcome.

Focus on the things that are within your direct circle of control.

You may be able to influence how your children spend their time or if your work is recognized and applauded but at the end of the day we can’t control those outcomes. You may work your butt off just to have your boss take your accomplishments away and never give you credit for it!

Instead you could ask yourself what makes you happy in the process of bringing up your children or striving for excellence at work. You could state “When I do what I love I’m a great role model to my children” or “ When I work on projects I’m passionate about I feel proud of my work”.

You may also want to consider the little things that can always brighten your day such as contributing to someone else’s work, taking time out for yourself or seeing beauty everywhere.

Learn to find happiness in the journey, not the outcome.

Sometimes we define external conditions such as “I’ll be happy when I will move to a new house” or “I’ll be happy when I lose 5 kg”.

“I’ll be happy when I get a promotion” implies that you need validation and happiness can only be achieved with certain outcomes. How could you find joy in the journey to a potential promotion and enjoy life even if your future turns out differently?

Or you may remember a time in the past when you were happy but believe that “those days will never return” or that “I’m too old to do the things that makes me happy”.

Stop living in a prison of the past or illusion of the future. The only time you can experience happiness is – now. Let’s focus on the things that bring happiness in the present moment.

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